Brand Deals
Author: hollybuckblog
Creepy Messages
Instagram Posts
Where I started vs Where I am now.
https://www.instagram.com/_publishednarcissist_/
From the very start of the FMP- I knew that I wanted to go back to questioning identity in my photographic practice. I first began with the idea of creating a life-sized human body created from hundreds of images of various people which I shot. The first artists which were suggested to me were Julie Cockburn and Maurizio Anzeri. They both used wool to add textures, patterns and colours into their portraits and, at first, seemed to be a great idea which I wanted to pursue. Then I began to think about the ‘how’- the material would be so incredibly heavy and I would be unable to suspend it in any way as there would be the fear of the material ripping or becoming damaged. This is when I began to experiment with how I could address identity in various ways- yet still using a new form of portraits.
I then began to think about using inspiration from my own creative-critical dissertation- I did extensive research into how narcissism is prevalent in the 21st century and social media.
During my tutorial with Ellen, we discussed how I could use my own writing to create a physical photo-documentary of her own thoughts of herself. She sees herself as a proud young woman who believes that she deserves a lot from life, however, people will see her as a straight-cut narcissist.
Also, I have addressed the negative connotations of social media. By doing this- I can show that the life of a narcissist isn’t always being seen as ‘perfect’; it’s the anxiety of not being seen as ‘perfect’ enough.
These are just a few screen shots from my new instagram account: _publishednarcissist_ (in the beginning, it was called _perfectionpersonified_ but I felt as though Ellen’s use of the term published narcissism in one of my feed back tutorials sounded better.
After a presentation in front of my class- I got some feedback into artists which have used social media in their own projects for some inspiration as to what level I could take this persona to.
The first suggestion was Amalia Ulman- a multidisciplinary artist based in LA. Her project: titled- Excellences and Perfections- was installed within the Tate Modern’s exhibition: Performing for the Camera. Ulman’s work consisted of creating a false persona- she pretended to have breast augmentation and posted carefully selected and frame images to sell her false lifestyle. This has inspired me to look back through my archive of photographs and dig up some old ones- selling a story of self love and narcissism.
My character: Emily, loves to post pictures of herself and read all of the comments on her feed; craving the attention and lives to watch her follower count rise and rise with every passing day. As of 8/5/2019- she has 118 followers, two days ago she had 79.
The next instagram blogger that I was shown was @lilmiquela. The interesting part of this blog, is that the character being shown in the images- isn’t human. Lil Miquela is a self confessed robot living in LA who is a singer and a model. The artist takes photographs of themselves and digitises them- portraying themselves to be something that they physically cannot be. However, her 1.5 millions followers all love her feed and comment on her released music: she has been compared to other electronically digitised artists such as the Gorillaz and Hatsune Miku. This blog has created such an in-depth story line that is so intriguing and captivating- that I knew I wanted to attempt to do something similar on a smaller scale.
With the previous bloggers- they interacted with their audience at such a high velocity that every comment was reacted to and it seemed as though most questions got answered- so this is what I have done too. I have received messages from brands asking me to represent their jewellery and clothes. I’ve even been asked to become involved in a one to one shoot on a mystery location shoot. All of the brands and photographers which have contacted me have mostly been pleasant; this is where it gets dark.
Emily loves to post pictures of her body- she knows that she is gorgeous and loves to flaunt off her curves and promote a healthy relationship with your body (even if she doesn’t have one); the blog has received plenty of people asking her to take nude self-portraits so they can use them to pleasure themselves. The blog has been sent ‘dick-pics’ on multiple occasions that I (as Emily) have managed to brush off and continue talking to the person. Whenever she gets complimented, I always replied in a way that reminds the person that she knows that she is beautiful- she just wants to show off her body which she has worked hard for.
Emily is a model- she loves animals and is obsessed with makeup. I knew that when I created this blog- I could use these terms to gain an advantage. Modelling clothes and jewellery, animal portraits and makeup tutorials are all incredibly popular on this platform; all of the hashtags that I include with every post help to promote my blog as well: #aspiringmodel #animallover #makeuplook #makeupartist. If I post an image of makeup, I will always tag the brand of makeup which has been shown. This will encourage people who follow the brand of makeup to check out my blog.
I have spent hours scrolling through Emily’s suggested follow blogs and built her character around that. She started off being a young woman who just craved validation and attention- now she is a aspiring model who absolutely adores her animals to pieces and takes her followers on the journey of her life: from taking photographs of the studios that she has been in to photographs of her full english breakfast.
With the overall project I wish to describe it as such:
_publishednarcissism_ is a look into how traits of narcissism can be portrayed and addressed online- delving deeply into how we wish to show ourselves online through images and text. This project is a piece which proves how easy it is to create a false persona on Instagram specifically; using my own images I have created a character who craves attention and needs to feel accepted as popular, beautiful and lusted after.
People, from all over the world, have accepted my persona and continued to watch her grow. But it hasn’t been completely fun.
It sometimes is hard to disassociate her character from myself- which is difficult because we share the same face. This project has made boyfriend and I, uncomfortable on more than one occasion, but I think this proves just how easy it is to take someones face, change their name and create a whole new identity for them.
The quotes which have primarily shaped my project into what it is today are as follows (they have all been selected from my own creative-critical dissertation):
- I was reading through all of the comments when his username popped up on my notifications: ‘Gosh you’re gorgeous, I’d love to call you mine’ with lots of love heart emoji’s on the end. I let out a breathless giggle. Was I really attractive enough to be called gorgeous?
- I know I’m gorgeous; all of my friends and family know this. My body is stunning- my body comprises of strong muscle and smooth skin, years of dancing on stage and body treatments at the spa (as paid for by my mother) has left me, basically a goddess.
- No one could be completely perfect…
- Validation is a must. It is. I crave it. To be lusted after, envied and wanted is all I want in life.
- I know I deserve a perfect life- I have been told I do!
- It’s 4 am now. I should probably sleep; my eyelashes are resting upon my full cheeks and my breathing has slowed down considerably. The heart palpitations have subsided. I’ve turned my phone off- it’s been far too long since I’ve done that.
I am incredibly impressed, but also concerned, with how many people assume that my character is real- I’ve been contacted about everything from whether or not I charge for nude photographs and how much it would cost to promote peoples skin care brands.
Please feel free to have a look at my instagram and see how I created Emily:
Final Exhibition Personal Evaluation
Personally, I believe that I have been a strong member of the Marketing and PR team; I have contributed a lot of time researching various techniques and how to hold peoples interest online and used this to create our social media more effective.
I am a great communicator and I pride myself on being proud of every piece of work I do (whether it be my own personal work, or work in part of a team).
I have thoroughly enjoyed being able to promote the exhibition online, as this has given me the practice that I will need in my future endeavours as a photographer.
Our team has been extremely well organised and I proud of the work which we have completed and achieved.
I knew that I would be a strong member for the Marketing and PR Team, as I know that I am confident in being able to sell the work which we are showing online, making the viewer that much more interested to see where the work will lead. Being in charge of the Instagram account has been rewarding and challenging- I have learnt different marketing techniques along the way.
I have had inspiration from other classmates blogs- but also, looking at the social media and marketing strategies of the previous BA Honours shows for different universities showing in the area.
I am confident that the show is going to be such a successful event as all of the class has come together to really pull every thing off. I am so proud of the work that we have achieve; I am looking forward to the next step:
Setting everything up.
Strategic 3-5 Year Plan
As a student who has been able to study the art of photography in one of the most well received universities in the UK for arts and design has been a pleasure and an honour. To be part of a group of aspiring artists who are attempting to find their own personal style of photographic art and play on the typical norms of how to express oneself or viewpoints through photography.
After I graduate from my BA Honours photographic course, I will be going the MA team to further enrich my knowledge of the photographic art world and challenge myself to even more difficult tasks and attempt to overcome any issues which I am bound to face when expressing myself in the art world.
So, for a year after I graduate- I will still be in education.
I will continue to sustain my part time job, as this is a reliable income- as much as I want it to be, photography isn’t (especially my specific specialised type of photography). This will continue to provide funds for travelling to diverse shoot locations and purchasing new and more expensive equipment, once I feel as though I need to move on and expand from the current equipment that I will be using.
Researching into how I can incorporate my photography and A Level in Creative Writing into one future career path- I believe that journalism (or more specifically photojournalism) would be best suited for me. I love being able to control a blog and working with other to publish their work- having a lot of responsibilities and control of what I’m able to write sounds like the perfect career path for me. Also, if I would be able to write articles which would correspond to the images which I have previous taken (or taken for the purpose of using them for the specific article) would be perfect for me.
I like being different in my style of photography and I feel as though it will be forever changing.
Realistically- yet also unrealistically- my all time goal is achieve a doctorate degree in photography. I want to be able to pursue photography and education as far as I can go. Trying new things, learning what doesn’t work for me, discovering what I want to prove with my photography and finally- be able to do something that I love for the rest of my life. I want to lecture; teaching aspiring new artists the wonderful world of photographic culture and how it can change the world. Photography has yet to be properly accepted into the art world, and I want to do my part in changing that.
Whilst I am continuing my studies, I will be working alongside my photographic career as I will need a stable income.
I am learning new things every day whilst I’m studying at UCA and I love every second of it. Learning about new artists, getting to listen on their lectures (my all time personal favourite visiting lecturer meeting was Zed Nelson- his work has completely inspired me to challenge the normality of beauty and how we can all perceive it in different ways) and working with so many people, with whom I will be eternally grateful for.
In order for me to achieve my goal of acquiring a PHD in photography, I will really need to ramp up my communication game; as previously stated, it is all about who you know in the photographic world. Meeting like-minded individuals and getting to know them and work with them, will really boost my career in the right direction.
After graduating from my masters in 2020, I will probably take a year or two to fully save up the money for some new equipment- whilst also simultaneously running my photographic business. In this time, I will be able to form a wider circle of clients and improve on my techniques as time passes.
Being able to achieve a PHD in photography has been a personal goal of mine for so many years- being able to find a way to realistically achieve that is an extreme confidence boost.
SOAR Analysis
Strengths
As a photographer, I know that my forte is with portraits. I love being able to fully capture a persons personality, without them realising that I’ve even taken the photograph. Shooting with an erratic model for so many years has taught me how to look for openings in the madness and shoot in the split second that their true personality shows through the facade that every single person puts up in front of the camera.
I thoroughly enjoy learning new techniques when it comes to photography, such as using the dark rooms and learning new editing styles in light-room. Throughout my time at UCA- I have learnt all different types of files and the best ways to shoot in certain situations.
My goal is to be able to find beauty in the little things, such as the glimmer of light in someones eyes or the freckles on their cheeks that look like constellations.
As a photographer, you have to know what your strengths and weaknesses are: I am patient photographer who always enjoys the shoots which are energetic and unpredictable. However, my main weakness is trying too long to find the correct setting to capture my images (whether it be manual, aperture priority or shutter speed).
Opportunities
In the previous year- I have been approached by both friends, and friends of friends to take photographs for them. They have either found my active social media or heard about my photographic business through friends or people who I have already taken photographs for.
This really has been an incredible experience as I have met some lovely people and future models through the use of my business- as well as asking my clients to suggest my business to their friends and leave a realistic review for my own personal log. This allows me to reflect on what aspects of my photography which I can improve on.
Recently, I have found some websites which have been advertising for featuring photographers who would be willing to work on a project all together (I’ve submitted my information to a job advert for a photographer for a weekend shoot in Spain!)
Aspirations
With my photography, I want to be able to shoot the beauty in the little details of life and the mundane aspects of various things. I adore shooting with a 50mm lens as it allows me to get some incredible macro detail in my portraits and animal photography. One thing that I love doing with photography- is finding patterns which occur in a natural setting- such as on an animal or in the bark of a tree.
I thoroughly enjoy being able to see the joy of showing my clients the finished product of their shoot; it really makes me cherish being able to make people happy by taking some candid portraits of them. Sometimes, people don’t realise how naturally pretty their smile is until you capture that snapshot of a genuine smile or a natural and loud belly laugh.
Results
My photography has completely changed throughout my time at university. I really have enjoyed seeing my style and techniques change and improve, as it proves that I have discovered what I believe is beautiful. Also, with my photographs, I am able to show what see people may miss when looking at nature with a passing glance; the patterns, textures, colours and naturally occurring shapes within the fur of animals or leaves which have fallen up the ground in Autumn time.
I have expanded my photographic portfolio and business by keeping on top of my social media and having my friends and clients suggest me as a personal photographer whenever the discuss about wanting to have photographs taken.
Portrait Portfolio
These are my top six images for my portrait portrait portfolio- I know that my strong point is natural photographs; I feel as though I am really able to capture the personalities of my models.
I love using my camera to try and capture who they really are- rather then have them model for me and only portray what they want to show. But, I thoroughly enjoy learning about my model through the photographs I have taken.
These photographs are my favourite six.
The first image was of a band performing at the Rochester castle gardens concerts- I was asked to take some photographs for Medway Matters.
The second was a photograph taken when I was learning my way around the 50mm lens.
The third was during a soul night at the Rochester Castle Garden concert- she was such an amazing performer, I was completely drawn to her confidence and finesse.
The fourth is of my friend, Jack. I, once again, was still learning my way around the 50mm lens and wanted to photograph something at close range- to test the depth of field of the lens.
The fifth image is one of my favourites- being able to take photographs for Craig David was such an honour.
The sixth and last image is a simple one. I am so drawn to the colour yellow and I think that the relationship between the child and adult is so apparent in this photograph; she completely trusts the man she is riding on as she is soundly asleep. He is her carer and he knows he has an important role to play in her care for the day.
Holly Buck- Reflective Journal 